John Eldredge hits the nail on the head:
The sense of being part of some bigger story – a purposeful adventure that is the Christian life – begins to drain away again after those first-love years, in spite of everything we can do to stop it. Instead of feeling like a love affair with God, your life begins to feel more like a series of repetitive behaviors, like reading the same chapter of a book or writing the same novel over and over. The orthodoxy we try to live out, defined as “Believe and Behave Accordingly,” is not a sufficient story line to satisfy whatever turmoil and longing out heart is trying to tell us about. Somehow out head and heart are on separate journeys and neither feels like life. (Epic, p.30)
How could you more explicitly describe the Christian walk when we try to walk it on our own? Our heads and hearts go in two separate directions, allowing our own goals and agendas to kick-start and take over control. Thankfully, grace is much bigger than us. The off key is surrender, which allows us to relinquish control.
The act of surrender is likely the most difficult thing a human can do. Where is the security in it? Who wants to fear the unknown? I cannot see God, so how do I know I can trust Him? Our rational would say it is absurd.
Look back at a time that you took that leap of faith, and let go of the steering wheel. No doubt you were afraid, but do you remember the excitement? Do you recall the peace and satisfaction that your starving spirit felt, as if you fed him a 16oz steak with mashed potatoes? In fact, do you remember the relief you felt? Satan does not want us to remember these thoughts and feelings, which is why he keeps us so busy with thoughts of worry.
As I personally look at my own moments, it humbles me. I feel a peace that surpasses all human understanding when I remember the intimacy God and I have shared. Today, my goal is to reflect of many of these times in my life. It is rejuvenating. My challenge for you would be the same.
I will give them a heart to know me, that I am the Lord. They will be my people, and I will be their God, for they will return to me with all their heart. ~ Jeremiah 24:7